well that's adorable.

“That’s right, I am a fucking crocodile now. Crocodiles don’t fetch papers and crocodiles chew on whatever the hell they want because we’re fucking crocodiles. Yeah, I peed in the living room right when you ignored me to watch The Hills. YOU DON’T IGNORE A CROCODILE! You rub his belly and feed him real food like slabs of ham or he will eat the cat like he’s been threatening to do for years. Now leave me alone, I have to get back to chewing on your dress shoes. DON’T TRY TO STOP ME, I AM A GODDAMN CROCODILE!”